


Going off the Rails

by starkintern



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: Angst, Author Is Doing His Best, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Endgame is Ignored, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Happy Ending, Hurt Peter Parker, Hurt/Comfort, If you guys didnt get that from the summary, Infinity War is ignored, Mind Manipulation, Not Canon Compliant, Panic Attacks, Sensory Overload, Still has Far From Home spoilers, Technically an AU, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark is alive, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, as they should be, descriptions of injuries, just kidding, nothing too graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-17
Updated: 2019-07-17
Packaged: 2020-06-29 22:49:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19840141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starkintern/pseuds/starkintern
Summary: [ FAR FROM HOME SPOILERS. rated T for language. ]Peter Parker suddenly realizes that he no longer likes trains - or being mentally manipulated. Tony Stark proceeds to lose his shit. Happy Hogan just wants to know what's going on.





	Going off the Rails

**Author's Note:**

> i honestly have no reason to write this other than the fact that i wanted to and that i just needed a distraction. so i wrote the first thing that came to my mind: "what if tony was still alive when far from home happened? he'd probably lose his shit." everything is in peter's point of view.  
> there's a lot of fluff here, just a warning. a lot of crying and then nice, fuzzy moments. enjoy! 
> 
> IMPORTANT NOTE: infinity war & endgame didn't happen in this fic! this fic is set a year or two after homecoming.  
> there are also some references to a fic i wrote called "sorry about your plane." you don't need to read it to know what's going on here, but there's some parallels! 
> 
> ANOTHER IMPORTANT NOTE: everything is PLATONIC! this is a father-son thing going on. starker will NEVER ever be in my fics. 
> 
> title is from ozzy osbourne's song "crazy train"

Peter messed up. Big time. 

As he slumped down on the train’s seat, the only illumination coming in intervals of mere seconds from lights inside the tunnel, his entire body aching, his mind racing with paranoia, he knew that he had dug himself a hole so deep that he couldn’t climb out of it. 

Fuck. 

He tried moving, but searing pain stopped him and he had to bite his lip to prevent a weak gasp from coming out. He had to call someone. Anyone. 

He didn’t remember getting his phone out but when he looked again, it was clutched in his hands. He tapped on a contact’s name by instinct. The bright light emanating from the cracked screen made his head throb but Peter forced himself to watch it ring, and it did all the way to voicemail. 

Of course Tony Stark wouldn’t pick up. Peter had insisted that Mysterio had everything under control, despite Tony’s warnings that he didn’t trust a single thing about that man who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. He had told Tony that he wasn’t going to do any superhero business, that he was just going to go through with his plan to date Michelle and have a normal summer vacation in Europe. He even insisted that if Nick Fury did need his help, then he was fully capable of handling it on his own, bringing up the Vulture incident as ammunition in the argument. Tony begrudgingly let the topic go and that was that on the conversation. Peter failed to keep any of those promises. 

His mind then urged him to call Ned and Michelle. He had to make sure that they were alright. He wanted to, he desperately did, but pain was what stopped him. His entire face hurt, there were several wounds on his back that he was sure would need stitching, and there was one part of his abdomen that felt like it was on fire. It hurt to breathe. He felt his mind begin swimming, his paranoia slowing down to a nearly sluggish pace, and he knew that he might not be able to hold on for much longer. He was trying. Peter was really, really trying. 

He squeezed his eyes shut and focused on his breathing, and that was getting more and more painful as the seconds breezed by. He felt like he - well, like he had been beat up and then hit by a train. The tunnel seemed to go on for hours. He considered calling Happy but now he doubted that he could muster enough strength to pick up his phone. 

His enhanced hearing barely managed to pick up the sound of a voice. 

“Kid? Peter? Oh, there you are.” The voice sounded so far away. Familiar but not anywhere near him. Peter’s heart began to race again and he didn’t dare open his eyes just in case it was Mysterio messing with him again. The voice came back, stronger this time, and with a hand clasped on his shoulder, “Shit. Fuck. What the fuck? That’s a lot of blood. Your back is bleeding up a waterfall. What happened to you, Pete?” 

Peter knew that voice. His brain was a little slow but he recognized it nonetheless. Tony. Wait, since when did Tony get here? How did Tony even know he was here? How did he get here so fast? He opened his eyes just in time to see the flashing light from the window illuminate the area around him. Sure enough, Tony was there, his hand now resting on Peter’s upper back. He looked like he arrived in a rush. His dark hair was tousled, his clothes were wrinkled, he wasn’t wearing his Iron Man suit but Peter was certain it was somewhere nearby – wait…was he actually certain? 

Terror made his blood run cold. 

Peter had never scrambled to his feet faster in his entire life. 

“Tell me something that only you would know.” Peter managed to say, his hands trembling as he clutched the back of the seat. His mind was foggy and nausea was beginning to take hold of him. Peter was starting to wish that he would just pass out already. 

Tony looked confused. His eyebrows furrowed and in the bright blue glow of the Arc Reactor, Peter could see worry lines on his face. “What? What are you talking about, kid? What the hell even happened? Who did this?” 

His voice sounded so genuine that Peter wished that he was real. Now he couldn’t trust his own eyes and the Tony he was seeing might not be Tony at all. The stupid, childish part of him wanted to stumble into his arms and forget about everything but his fear and survival instincts kept that urge at bay. Peter couldn’t take chances, his life depended on it and right now he felt like he was a few steps away from dying. 

“Tell me something that only you would know.” Peter insisted, hearing his own words begin to slur together in a jumbled sentence. “Are you real?” 

“ _What?_ Of course I’m real! Peter, what are you talking about?” Then there was silence and Tony continued in a softer tone of voice, “Alright, fine. I’ll prove it. This isn’t the first time I’m picking you up when you’re hurt to this extent. The only other time I could remember is when you crashed my plane and then decided to take a nap right after. I’ve never seen my blood pressure so high. And when I dropped you off at your apartment, you called me-”

“Okay, okay, you’re real.” Peter interrupted before Tony could finish retelling a moment that Peter was still embarrassed about, relief washing over him like a wave. He took one look at Tony’s worried face before promptly saying, “I messed up.”

Then everything went black.

* * *

Something was _stabbing_ Peter in the upper back. 

Panic settled in quickly but his thoughts were fuzzy and everywhere. He couldn’t focus. His eyes settled on an orange-looking cushion beneath him – he couldn’t look at it for long, his head was starting to pound. Too bright. 

The stabbing pain came back again. For some reason, Peter’s thoughts snapped to MJ and Ned. “My…friends…” he moaned, his voice sounding like it belonged to someone else. “They’re in danger…I have to go…”

He was beginning to feel himself drift off again. Everything started to blur. He couldn’t let go! Mysterio was going to get them! He was going to - 

“I have to go…I have to save…” 

Peter was out like a light mere seconds later.

* * *

The next time he woke up, the stabbing pain was gone, almost as if it was never there in the first place. 

He had been sleeping on an orange couch, small enough to fit two people, nestled on the side of a pure white interior. His first thought, entirely influenced by the walls, was that he was in a hospital. 

Peter shakily sat up, confusion flooding through him as he took in the rest of his surroundings. He wasn’t feeling his best, nowhere near it, but he was definitely feeling more alert than before. There were multiple seats in a single aisle and when he looked up, the ceiling looked circular. A plane. Or perhaps something smaller. A jet? Yeah, a jet. Why was he in a jet? Where was Tony? Peter remembered seeing Tony on the train before he passed out – or maybe he was just hallucinating? Maybe that Tony was just Peter’s mind playing tricks on him?

Peter crushed any other thoughts that threatened to plague him. His head was beginning to hurt again. He drew in ragged breathes, trying to make sense of his situation. Eventually his attention was caught by the sound of faint voices in the jet. 

“Listen, Peter didn’t even know if I was real or not. Whatever’s going on, it’s not good. He hasn’t been drugged so the only explanation is mind manipulation.” 

“I have no idea what could have caused that. We’ve watched the news, the only thing going on there involves those elemental monsters. Nothing about possible mind tricks or any of that, Tony.” 

_Tony. Tony. He’s here? He was real? Is that Happy? Is Happy here, too?_

There was a brief pause. “I shouldn’t have let him try to handle this himself. There’s clearly something else, something bigger going on here. He’s just a kid.” 

Peter closed his eyes again. The pain was still there but less searing. His face still hurt and he reached up to touch it, wincing as his hand brushed against a bruise on his cheek. He opened his eyes and looked down at his hand to find that there were little bandages on his fingers, and he softly smiled as he noticed the Star Wars patterns on each bandage. 

He could hear the voices continue conversing and he quickly identified them, with one hundred percent certainty, as belonging to Tony and Happy. Suddenly remembering his interaction with Tony on the train, he couldn’t help but wonder if that was all real or if it was just a dream. He hauled himself up from the couch, vertigo causing him to grab onto the nearest chair in hopes of steadying himself. There was still a prominent limp in his leg when he walked so he knew that he couldn’t walk very far. 

“Mr. Stark?” Peter called in a hopeful tone of voice, wondering if his voice was strong enough for Tony to even hear him. When he didn’t get a response, he let go of the chair and began to limp his way towards the front of the jet, in the direction of the voices. 

He didn’t get very far before Tony appeared in his field of vision, taking Peter aback. 

“You’re awake.” Relief was plainly evident in Tony’s voice and Peter only managed to offer him a brief smile before he was pulled into the man’s chest, his head resting slightly above the Arc Reactor. Peter was surprised that Tony was initiating the hug since more than often, it was Peter who did. This time it was Tony who held on tightly, one of his hands tangling in his hair while the other rested on Peter’s back, careful not to press against the wounds there. “Jesus, you scared me, Pete. You looked like shit.” 

Happy came up behind Tony. “You better tell us what’s going on because we have no clue.” 

Immediately, Peter’s mind threatened to go into overdrive. _This is too good to be true. How did they get here so fast? I’m in Europe. There’s no way this is happening for real. Mysterio is trying to manipulate me again. He knows I’m still alive. This is all fake. This can’t be real. This isn’t real. This isn’t real. Thisisn’trealthisisn’trealthisisn’treal –_

Tony seemed to notice Peter’s lack of action. He pulled away enough for the both of them to look at each other but his hands remained in the same places as before. His lips moved and he was asking something but Peter began to feel overwhelmed again so the words were lost to him. 

_Tell me something only you would know._ Those are the words Peter wanted to say. However, before he could even open his mouth, they got stuck on his tongue and he couldn’t say anything. Peter simply looked at Tony through teary eyes, noticing the man’s barely hidden worried expression, the way his hands seemed to be shaking, the dark circles under his eyes that proved that he didn’t sleep in a while – probably not since the elemental monsters started showing up. 

“Wow, kid, I thought you were a hugger. Way to leave a guy looking like an idiot. Is this payback for that one time I opened the car door for you?” Tony began to say, clearing his throat awkwardly before his protective nature inevitably took over. “Are you alright? Did I accidentally pull one of your stitches? We had to stitch up a lot on your back. Happy, can you bring the first aid kit just in –”

_It’s him. It’s really him._

Peter cut him off with a nearly bone-crushing hug (of course, he controlled his strength so he would not crush Tony’s bones), relief seeming to pour into every part of his body. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know if I was being tricked again. You’re real. I’m so glad you’re real.” 

He felt Tony tense up. “Yeah, I’m real. You are, too. You’re here. You’re safe. Whatever happened there won’t happen here, I promise.” He said in a soothing tone that was so rarely heard from the man – of course, since Peter was so close to him, he heard it quite often when something was wrong. 

Peter nodded in response to his words but was silent, pressing his cheek against Tony’s chest, his arms wrapped around his back, clutching the man’s shirt as if he were holding on for dear life. It felt nice to be speaking to someone real, to know that nothing around him was an illusion. He didn’t even realize that he was crying until he felt the shirt getting wet. _This is real. This is all real._

When Peter stopped crying and finally began to feel more stable, Happy basically pushed the two of them on the nearby couch, ordering them to tell him what the hell was going on, and Peter smiled at the man’s familiar attitude. It wasn’t pleasant most of the time but it was _real_ and that was all that mattered. 

Happy sat down on a chair in front of them. Peter sat on the edge of the couch and Tony was right beside him, and he tossed an arm around Peter’s shoulders for support. Peter appreciated the action and instinctively leaned into him. Both men look at him expectantly. It is just then that Peter realizes he has no idea where to start – there is just so _much_ to say. The feeling of being overwhelmed looms in his chest but he tries his best to suppress it. 

“Do you guys know the old song ‘Crazy Train’?” Peter asks, trying his best to come off as casual, like he always would have when he was younger, but his words were wry. He isn’t taking it from the top but his stomach was beginning to churn at the thought of revisiting those illusions. 

“Yes, and I don’t like where this is going.” Tony carefully says as he straightens up. 

His hand traveled to his abdomen as the memory quickly came back. “I…I didn’t see it coming. As soon as I realized I was on the tracks, it was too late.” 

Tony’s eyes narrowed and he looked angry but Peter knew better than to think that he was angry at him. “Something tells me you didn’t step on those tracks by yourself. You would’ve sensed it coming.” 

“The Peter Tingle.” Happy pitched in helpfully, and Peter looked at him in shock. Only Aunt May called his spider-sense that and if Happy blurted it out, then Tony would start using it, too. That man would _never_ let it go. Wait, since when did Happy start hanging out with Aunt May enough to pick up some of her phrases? 

However, Tony didn’t seem to be paying attention to that. “Peter? Did someone push you there? This has something to do with your messed up perception of reality, right?” 

Leave it to Tony to deduce what was going on. Peter simply nodded. “He’s really fast with illusions. I don’t know how long I was stuck in them. I couldn’t keep up, I didn’t realize where I was until the train hit me. I think he thinks I’m dead or just too badly injured to stop him. He knows I know his tricks. He also knows that my friends know.” 

He heard Happy let out a string of curses while Tony looked like he was prepared to call his entire legion of Iron Man suits. Meanwhile, Peter felt everything begin to weigh on his shoulders at once. His friends were in danger. The lives of many other people were in danger. Mysterio successfully tricked him and Peter _let_ him. Everything that happened was Peter’s fault. 

Maybe if he wasn’t so selfish and was vigilant all the time. Maybe if he wasn’t so trusting of anyone who seemed to have good intentions. Maybe if he were a better superhero… 

“Kid? You’re a little quiet.” Tony asked, forcing Peter out of his thoughts, his concerned tone of voice quickly returning. 

“I fucked up!” Peter suddenly exclaimed as he stood up, his voice rising to a desperate tone, frustration bubbling in his chest. Pain wracked his body when he first stood but his emotions overpowered that. “I messed everything up. I trusted him. I didn’t realize that it all wasn’t real. I couldn’t beat him the first time and now everyone I know and love is in danger. I put them in danger. I don’t know how to fix it, I don’t know how to beat him, I don’t know how to save them. What the hell am I supposed to do?” 

He was met with silence. Peter desperately wiped the tears from his face again, settling back down on a chair. He could feel their eyes on him and he hated it. He hated himself for not being strong enough to handle Mysterio. He thought he had proved his worth as a superhero when he took down the Vulture. What kind of a hero was he? This time, his words were directed at Tony despite his refusal to look at him. “I’m not like you. You’d know what to do.” 

“You’re not supposed to be like me.” Tony broke the silence and Peter looked up at him with teary eyes. Tony hesitated, as if weighing his options, and threw a glance at Happy before continuing, “Even I wouldn’t know what to do. I can’t live up to Iron Man and I _am_ Iron Man. I accidentally put my friends in dangerous situations a lot. Most of the time I didn’t know what to do. I was afraid. Every hero gets scared. I can tell you that Cap gets scared, too. You were scared too when you faced Mysterio, right? But you fought him?” 

Peter nodded his head, sniffling. “I had to. I didn’t want him to hurt anyone else.” 

“That’s what heroes do. We internalize that fear because no matter what -”

“We don’t want anyone else to feel that fear, too.” Peter finished and Tony offered him a proud smile. 

“That’s it? Bonding moment over? Can we get back to the illusions?” Happy asked them but Peter caught the fond look on his face before it disappeared. “I know the code for Nick Fury. Once we establish what’s going on, I can warn him before any other shit goes down.” 

Feeling a little less stressed, Peter briefly explained the nature of the illusions that Mysterio played on him, leaving out any parts about the things he saw that included Tony and MJ just because he didn’t trust himself to not freak out. Despite Peter leaving out certain details – arguably the worst details – it still seemed to infuriate both of the men inside the jet. If Tony didn’t look like he wanted to commit a murder before, he certainly looked like it now. 

“Do you know his real name?” Happy inquired. 

“Yeah, yeah. I know. He told me it was Quentin Beck.” 

Peter watched all the color drain from Tony’s face. “Did you just say Beck?” 

“Do you know him? He didn’t mention you.” 

“Of course he didn’t. That asshole. Did he see you without your mask on?” 

Peter winces. “He knows who I am by name and face. And he knows which of my friends know the truth about him. I accidentally told him.” 

Happy looked exasperated while Tony groaned and put his face in his hands. When he lifted his face back up, Peter was surprised to find that he looked even more frustrated than before. “I fired him because he was too unstable. He made great technology, that technology can help people with PTSD and other mental disorders. Something about him felt off. He made weird comments. Pep and I discussed it, I had no choice.” 

“He’s trying to get back at you by using the kid, boss.” Happy input but at this point it was obvious to everyone in the jet. 

Another silence fell upon them as they all got lost in dreadful thoughts. Peter already knew what to do. He already knew what to say. “Then I have to be the one to beat him.” 

“ _Excuse me?_ Please tell me that you’re not serious about this. You might just send me to the hospital. Peter, I don’t think you understand the condition you were in on the train. You looked like you were two seconds away from keeling over.” Tony protested, his eyebrows raising all the way up to his forehead in his classic ‘are you fucking serious’ expression. 

“I messed up, Mr. Stark.” Peter insists. “This is all my fault. I trusted Mysterio and now my friends are in danger, as well as a ton of other people. This is all because of me. I have to fix this, and I have to fix it myself. I don’t want anyone else getting hurt. And like Happy said, he’s trying to get back at you by using me. He thinks that I’m weak and an easy target. I have to prove him wrong otherwise this will happen again with someone else with a vendetta against you. I have to finally step up.” 

Tony was silent, a conflicted look on his face, and Peter simply looked at him with pleading eyes. 

“Please, Tony.” 

“Oh, come on. That’s a dick move. _Now_ you decide to call me Tony? When I have to decide whether to let you go fight against a man who can mess with your perception of reality and kill you or to keep you safe here?” Tony threw his hands up in exasperation before folding them across his chest, heaving a sigh. “But you have a point. Okay, fine. We’ll talk about the terms and conditions later. What’s your plan, kid?” 

“I’m going to kick his ass.”

* * *

“Ouch!” 

“Sorry, buddy.” Tony apologized. “There’s no numbing cream in the first aid kit like there _should be._ We’re doing this the old-fashioned way. Did you know that back in the day they used to amputate without numbing anything?” 

“Not helping.” Peter grumbled and he could almost hear Tony’s smirk. While Peter was working on his suit in the little workshop installed to the jet, some of the stitches on a gash on his back tore and it started profusely bleeding again. Peter was going to let it go simply because he didn’t want to waste any time but once Tony checked up on him like the mother hen he was, he steered Peter straight out of there and back to the couch where they currently sat. 

The needle pierced through his skin again and he flinched, pressing his lips together in a tight line. Tears pricked at the edges of his eyes again not because of the pain but because of how hard Tony was trying to do it as carefully and painlessly as possible. 

“I saw you.” Peter croaked out before he could even think about what he was saying. “In the illusions. You were dead and it was all my fault. I knew that it wasn’t real but it _felt_ so real.” 

_I’m crying again. This is so pathetic,_ he bitterly thought. Peter hoped that Tony would just continue stitching and thankfully he did, in the same careful manner as before. This time, however, they were both silent. Peter was also glad that the wound that needed new stitches was on his back so he wouldn’t have to look at Tony after admitting that. To make matters worse, he was also certain that after all the crying he did on the jet, his eyes were puffy and red. Not exactly the look of a brave superhero ready to kick ass. The last thing he needed was Tony changing his mind about fighting Mysterio by himself. 

Finally, Tony pulled the needle away and tossed it into the little biohazard container that came with the first aid kit. Peter was thankful that it was over since after a while it did get awkward. He stood up, preparing to go back to the workshop to see how his new suit was coming together. However, he felt a hand clasp on his shoulder and immediately stopped. Oh no. Tony changed his mind. 

However, when Peter turned to look at him, Tony looked uncertain before he opened his arms up. An invitation to a hug. Peter didn’t even hesitate. This one was tighter than the first one but Peter didn’t mind at all. Tony was right. Peter was a hugger. 

“You hear that, right? My heartbeat?” Tony’s voice is quieter than usual when he asks. 

It was a steady heartbeat but definitely not a healthy one. Sometimes it skipped a few beats, sometimes it was too slow, or too fast. The Arc Reactor kept Tony stable by keeping his heart alive but at the same time, his heart was so much more vulnerable. It was a blessing and a curse. Peter nodded his head, pressing his cheek against him. He grew a little taller in the past year so his head no longer reached the middle of Tony’s chest but rather above it, though not by much. They weren’t level with each other yet. 

“Good. That’s real. I can feel your heartbeat, that’s real. My voice is real, too. The Arc Reactor is real, if you can hear it making noise. Remember that time you told me that it sounded like a refrigerator? I thought you were going to say something badass like car engine. It still stings when I think of that.” 

Peter sensed the humor in Tony’s voice and his lips curled into a smile. He felt safer. He knew that he still had a lot of work to do but for now at least he didn’t feel like everything was coming to get him. 

“You alright, bud?” 

“Yeah. Just thinking.” 

“About what?” 

“How Mysterio is going to get a healthy dose of reality from Spider-Man.” Peter explained, earning a laugh from Tony. He then added, “Thanks for helping me. I know I was in the wrong about Mysterio but I’m really happy that you came.” 

Tony shrugged as if it was no big deal. “It’s what parents – no, mentors! Yes, mentors. I meant mentors. It’s what _mentors_ do.” He shook his head as if mentally scolding himself. Peter couldn’t hold back his smile for long and Tony frowned as he took notice of it. “You didn’t hear anything. We still need to go over the terms and conditions, just so you don’t end up on another train.” 

When Tony broke the hug and walked away, murmuring under his breath, Peter turned back in the direction of the workshop. His suit was almost finished. He had customized it himself, Tony leaving him to make his own decisions about the suit, and it was exactly what he needed. Now all he needed to do was defeat Mysterio and make sure that everyone he loved was safe in the process. 

He was afraid. His past experiences with Mysterio haunted him like a shadow. He isn’t sure what he is going to do once the illusions hit him again but whatever happens, he will face it. He has to save his friends and family no matter what. 

That’s what heroes do. 

“Hey, can you play some more Led Zeppelin?”

**Author's Note:**

> i know this fic is really cheesy and stuff but i had fun writing it. i hope you all enjoyed it, thanks for checking it out. i promise im doing my best with my other unfinished fics.  
> comments & kudos are always appreciated, please let me know what you thought! thanks again!


End file.
